Apparently Summer has arrived. In fact, it supposedly arrived several weeks ago. Did you notice? Well neither did I. But then I remembered, I live in Ireland. A country where a good Summer is assessed by a slightly different scale of measurement.
10: You find yourself woken at 5am every morning by full daylight streaming into your south-facing bedroom.
9: But that daylight is diffused nicely by the thick dark grey, leaden sky.
8: Nothing says “Irish Summer” quite like hundreds of thousands of pasty skinned Irish people, all trying to get a tan from the sun which lies hidden behind that leaden sky.
7: The membership of Dail Eireann inform the nation that we should all holiday at home.
6: The membership of Dail Eireann climb onto passenger jets and take their holidays in the south of France.
5: Instead of wearing 6 layers of clothing, you strip down to a mere 3. Way to go near nudity!
4: You catch the neighbours cat eating its third swallow in two weeks. Said cat is unapologetic and looks to be getting decidedly plump.
3: Someone releases a terrible food based dance song…(see these two particularly bad examples from the past, you’re welcome.)
2: Every day of every week throughout the entire Summer, the news warns of imminent water cuts. Despite it seeming to rain several hours every single day.
1: Though it must be said of that rain, that it falls nice and vertically rather than near horizontally.
P.S. I admit this list is probably not up to my usual standards, my apologies. Lack of sleep is my only excuse.
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