Am I old now?

This morning while listening to the 80’s radio station on Spotify I actually came out and said the following to my Partner in Crime.

“80’s music was just better.”

Then I was called old.

I’m 35 years old.

Strictly speaking Amanda, is still less than a decade old.

But if I am totally honest I do feel old. Some days very, very old.

As any of my readers by now knows, I have a lot of physical problems. And one of the more troublesome aspects of those problems is that most mornings I wake up feeling as though I’d been beaten in my sleep. Hard. With a cricket bat. This manifests in my barely being able to walk the 15 feet to the toilet, and usually having to collapse back on to my bed for a little while afterwards.

Even 5 years ago I used to jump out of bed, and immediately be able to move gracefully. Now, I sort of half stumble everywhere for the first ten minutes out of bed.

Emotionally, I don’t fall for people like I used to. In fact in the past 12 months I’ve only had one crush. And even there I find myself not having any hope in my heart at all. It kind of feels like I found wisdom in loving, and that wisdom sucked the joy of adventure from my heart.

I can’t stay up late anymore. I want to be in bed with a mug of hot milk by 10pm every, single, night. And if I do stay up late it takes me days to stop feeling tired.

I can’t drink anymore. It just makes me feel, yuck.

I find myself watching old movies, and preferring them to modern remakes. I actually realized last week that I prefer The Thing From Another World (1951) to The Thing (1982).

I find myself wishing that gaming companies would stop making new games, and start updating the graphics on old games. I’d love to play a version of the Breath Of Fire series, where nothing has been changed aside from the music and graphics.

Do all of these mean that I am now old?

I’d rather sit in with a DVD than go out to a bar.

Actually I’d rather sit in with a parasitic worm infection than go out to a bar.

Am I setting in my ways.

Are carpet slippers, and 30 cats my next port of call?

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One Comment to “Am I old now?”

  1. Dear Amanda,

    I know where you are.
    After just being gifted a copy of the Hammer magazine by my other significant half, I perused the free CD that came with it. “15 tracks that were too heavy for hell”. It sounded like a overly potentialised homeopathic remedy to cure quasi heavy emo grunge… If it not for Hammer magazine to have a special on Iron Maiden, I would have crawled into a corned and dissolved myself by my own bitter tears…

    We are getting old… but there is a wisdom to it! We do snigger about the new that is not so new and far from original. I always wanted to be one of the hagglers at the Muppet show, but I guess I’m right there in the balcony, enjoying my well earned seat. So guess what? There is a free seat besides me, so join me if you are up to it. It’s either that or sitting on the porch, grumbling at passers-by and throw lizards at them….

    Oh wait,.. that sounds like fun too! 🙂

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