Stalled plans, and huge frustration

I’ve mentioned my upcoming webcomic several times in the past year. And each time it’s had to be put back by another month.

I moved home partly to be able to lower my cost of living, but also because that new home had enough space to give me a small woodworking workshop. Why does that matter? Because I’ve spent the past year designing my ideal ukuleles. I want to build them for myself, and perhaps some day to sell to other. Again delayed.

My video blog which started last month was another project which had been stalled again, and again.

Even this written blog started out as a project which had been put off over, and over.

That’s the thing about large projects, they tend to need fairly substantial preparation time before you can get into the meat of them. And life will often get in the way. At best this is frustrating, at worst it’s beyond infuriating.

My two worst current bug-bears in this regard are my webcomic, and my video blog. My webcomic is a project with 2 years of work already done on it, without a single panel having found its way on to the internet. I’ve spent months working on my drawing skills, working out characters, storylines, learning to use graphics programs, etc. It’s a lot of work to have already done with nothing solid to show for it. Why nothing to show for it? I’m doing the ground work for a new novel at the moment, which is rather time intensive, so until that’s done, and I get back to my regular writing schedule I’m buggered for time.

As for my video blog, it has admittedly been launched. But even after another month, and 40 hours of work over that time because of financial issues it still won’t have grown to what I had hoped it would be when I release my second edition next week.

Both of those projects are not precisely stalled, but they are being held back in different ways by life in general. The webcomic by my mad dash to clear a backlog of other work so I can finally set aside so much time per week purely for drawing. The video blog by my income having been savaged in the past two months reducing my discretionary budget from tiny to almost nothing. And it’s driving me nuts.

I have a story I want to tell, a story I’m excited by, enthusiastic about; the webcomic.

I also have things I want to say to the world, things I want the world to hear from my lips, not read from a page; the video blog.

But despite my hard work. Despite my enthusiasm. Despite how much love I have for both projects I am stalled. I drink not from the keg of victory, rather I’m stuck in the corner of the bar, and the barman just pawned me off with the dregs from last nights run off. And I am not happy about that.

Now that said I know I will get to where I want to be. My webcomic is going to be launched, come hell or high-water. My video blog will develop from a “talking head” model to the more magazine show format I want for it, just more slowly. So I’m not frustrated by things which will never happen. I guess that I’m simply irked by having run so hard and fast, just to stay where I am.

Here endeth the bitching, and moaning with a question. How do you deal with this particular sort of getting nowhere? And what mechanisms have you used in your own life to get through it.

4 Comments to “Stalled plans, and huge frustration”

  1. ok.. having the occasional bitchfest/bf/bitchfit is perfectly acceptable; and i believe a good release. To get all that shite out, clear the airways and move on. Therapeutic. This getting nowhere is life, and acceptance is the key, by that i don’t mean accept defeat that life will always fuck it up for you, but accept that shit happens and move on. In terms of mechanisms.. its a case of keeping sight of your goal and not letting ‘life’ get in the way. Keeping your plan and .. well, what i do is, i write a list and tick and date when i’ve achieved off/from that list. Then at least i can see progress is being made no matter how small…. but sometimes it is also good to pause for breath and reflect on what you’ve done, and how you’ve done it, and see if you could or should have done things differently… almost like an instrumental break during a song. Chin up xx

    • I actually from the very beginning of this blog tended to use Saturdays as a space for bitching sessions, when I needed them. And for personal stuff in general.

      I do the list thing as well. Though what often happens with me is I make the list and then as I work my way down it I realise the priority of the items on the list need to be changed. Because life has changed.

      Still I’m trying to view this as a chance to get my artwork as good as possible, and to make sure everything else is running just so before I jump into uyet another project.

      (You can add to that list, builing my own custom airsoft rifle, decorating my bedroom in a steampunk style, building a new PC, reaching grade 5 on mandolin etc etc etc I don’t like to be bored.)

  2. I think sometimes getting stalled is the universe’s way of making sure what you do happens at exactly the right moment in time. Which means when it does all come together, it will soar. Keep working, keep talking about it. My business stalled for two years, and now I’m scheduling work. At the exact right moment in my life when I have the time to devote to it. It will happen. 🙂

    • Thanks Vic, that’s pretty much what I keep telling myself. I am finding it frustrating to have come so far and now to be held up just as the race really starts. But Like you say, it’ll happen at the right time. And when I’m laying out my next novel is NOT the right time. Though my next vlog goes live on Thursday, so at least that’s moving forward, and is a hell of a lot of fun.

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