Who the hell though frozen Smarties were a good idea?

My mom is wonderful. But bless her cotton socks she does seem to think that deep down it’s still the 1980’s, and that I’m still 10 years old. Say this because I can think of no other logical reason for her deciding that I would be delighted to chow down on a huge tub of Nestle Smarties Ice Cream.

Okay let’s get this out-of-the-way first. I generally don’t like Nestle chocolate. The occasional Kinder Egg. But overall I find their chocolate far too sickly sweet.

However I am at heart a child of the 80’s. I was raised on Jelly Tots, Polar Mints, Whispa bars, and of course Smarties. I seriously doubt that any child who grew up in either Ireland or the United Kingdom managed to get through their childhood without eating a couple of kilo’s of Smarties. After all they were cheap, brightly coloured, and for a Nestle product surprisingly tasty. Though far from my favourites. To be honest these days I’d rather eat cat kibble then Smarties, but when I was a kid, chocolate was chocolate. And coming from a relatively poor background you took what you could get.

Flash forward from the 80’s, when my favourite thing to wear were my pair of royal blue corduroy shorts, to the present day, when my favourite things to wear are either my Mistress or my boyfriend.

My mom had decided that as a treat for my puppy sitting (just wait til I finish the post about THAT experience.) for her over the weekend, she would get some Smarties ice cream in the shopping. Admittedly along side two bars of Lindt white vanilla chocolate, a chocolate swiss-roll, and a dozen bags of popcorn. My mom knows me very well. I was dubious, but grateful, after all ice cream IS ice cream.

So Saturday rolled around, and feeling bloody awful I decided a viewing of The Andromeda Strain and a large bowl of ice cream were in order. I sit down, Take a spoonful, but it in my mouth, and without thinking I bit down on a harder than normal lump.


Who the fucking hell thought putting Smarties in to a frozen dessert was a good idea? Seriously?

The ice cream is delicious, but those little flattened pieces of chocolate are nothing less than a booby-trap. Perfectly designed to send you shrieking to the dentist.

Besides frozen Nestle chocolate tastes of pretty much…nothing. Nothing at all.

Okay maybe it’s just me. Maybe I’m at fault here, and I’ve lost so much of my inner child that the idea of rock hard chocolate waiting in ambush in my ice cream doesn’t fill me with glee.

Maybe it’s my fault because I’ve gotten older, and my health has weakened my teeth a little.

Maybe it’s my fault because didn’t look at what I was eating, assuming foolishly that I would be allowed to keep my teeth a while longer.

Or maybe, just maybe, who ever came up with the idea for Smarties in ice cream needs a good hard, swift kick to the testes. You know just to remind him that ice cream should be fun, not painful.




Have an opinion? Please share it with us.

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: